Tender Mercies

Tender mercies come in many forms; They are gifts and blessings from a Loving Heavenly Father to help those of his children in need.  At times they come directly from Him to help His children:  Then there are times when God uses others as his messengers to help those in need by lighting their load.

We arose this morning from a restless night, working on a few hours of sleep to find Adam in a place he has not been before. He is able to answer simple yes or no questions, but he is not able to find correct words to describe objects or situations. While holding up a cell phone and asked “what is this” he would say “a tomato.” Dr. B said it would get worse over the next two days, but then he would begin to get better… we are praying.

It is heartbreaking to see your child in an altered state, even now tears blur my vision as I try to type.  The thoughts are too deep and the emotions too powerful.. I am weak and almost have to kneel before them.

Yet what are the Tender Mercies of the Lord?  The “… tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith, to make them mighty even unto the power of deliverance” (1 Ne. 1:20).  The Lord is mindful of all His children and stands ready with open arms, if we will but go to Him.

At Cindy’s prompting and with some of her thoughts I write the following;  A few of our Tender Mercies

1.  Tender Mercy #1: Late manifestation of TS. Adam has Tuberous Sclerosis (TS): It is a genetic disorder and has caused tubers to form in his brain.  Most Children who have this disorder and when discovered at birth have their mental development slowed; It is usually discovered because the child is having seizures.  Seizures will hamper or severely disrupt the development of the brain… A large percentage of children with TS never develop mentally.

Adam was Seven Years Old when he first showed signs of TS… in the form of a Grand Mal Seizure, clinically know as a “Tonic-Clonic” seizure.  This Tender Mercy allowed Adam’s brain to form the connections that are so important for a child to function. He was blessed with a reprieve from the destroying effects of seizures during these formative years.

2.  Tender Mercy #2:  Michele Boehner: It was Michele who first told us about Dr. Lee. I mean no disrespect towards Adam’s other doctors, but Dr. Lee has put together a phenomenal  team of specialists.. and their practice is growing with more talent being recruited  .  I can not imagine this type of surgery with anyone or any other team in Florida. It was through Michele.. just a simple comment in a conversation with Cindy that we were led here.

3.  Tender Mercy #3:  Family & Friends; Cindy and I are so grateful for our Family ties, those eternal relationships and for the friendships we have developed over the years. Many have taken time out of their busy lives to make our day better.  I could not begin to name the names and would be afraid to do so just in case I missed someone.  God knows who you are, we know who you are and we wish to say… Thank You.

4.  Tender Mercy #4: Adam’s Eagle Project. It was truly a miracle that Adam was able to get his Eagle Project Approved , Completed, along with the Eagle Scout Board of Review.  This took an army of effort to accomplish it in such a short time. Things had to fall into place, specific people had to be contacted, review processes needed to function… and so many more items needed to be done.  People had to come together… and they did… help and assistance was needed… it arrived.  It fills my heart to have seen a simple miracle come about that others might have missed; I suppose many miracles are wrought this way, simple and unassuming.. No neon lights flashing in the sky; No billboards, No trumpets sounding over the airways, just the everyday, ordinary work moving along in an ordinary way; a miraculous way, unnoticed by many..but found by a few.   Thank You.

41/2 Tender Mercy # 4 1/2: The Day before surgery:  After Adam’s first surgery he had been experiencing a great deal of pain. This continued for most of the week.  He could only take short periods of time to exercise mental alertness when others were around.  There was swelling on the left side of his brain, numbness in his right arm and in general he felt terrible.  But the day before surgery, Tuesday, it was as if a switch had been flipped for Adam.  He was his old jolly self, making jokes, enjoying everyone who came to see him.. his endurance was as if he never had surgery; as if he did not have the 108 electrodes on his brain.. it was our old Adam, and with an appetite. What a Tender Mercy it was to have him back for this short time, these precious moments of the day; What a wonderful blessing to our family that he could give his sisters a hug, to embrace each of us and tell us he loved us. In addition he was able to make his recording for all of us to hear… It was a wonderful blessing, something that could be overlooked by the skeptics. Thank you for being here on Tuesday.. today you are gone again.. Please come back… Dad.

5.  Tender Mercy #5: The Power of Prayer:  Over the past several days and even weeks many prayers have been offered in Adam’s behalf… Many from individuals, groups and congregations who have never met Adam, nor do they know him, yet their Christlike actions united with others who know Adam to petition Heavenly Father that the power of healing might be upon him; That the power of guidance would be upon his doctors and surgeons; That the strength of a united Faith would call down the powers of heaven for this young man.  People from all walks of life have joined in… how can I express my gratitude.. I don’t know how… please know that we are so thankful for each of you. This has been a miracle.. I understand that modern communications has allowed us to facilitate some of this, yet isn’t this a Tender Mercy in and of itself? Thank You.

6. Tender Mercy #6: John Fluhart: John is my boss at work, but a simple kind act on his part has had great ramifications.. there again it is the simple, almost unnoticed actions that carry the greatest meaning.  I had a two-day trip that I was supposed to fly the Monday and Tuesday prior to Adam entering the hospital… no big deal… I wasn’t really needed until Wednesday when Adam was admitted. John offered to fly my trip to allow me a little extra time with Adam.

During these two days, Adam and I had such a sweet time together.  All he wanted to do was be with me and spend time together.  We drove around to different pet shops looking at a variety of snakes and reptiles; We had long conversations and just hung out… oh how I cherish these small moments… Had I been gone I never would have had them and they would have been missed forever.  In addition to these events I was able to attend Adam’s Functional MRI.. very important to be with him and I was able to be at his Eagle Scout Board of Review.. a once in a life time event… Thank you John, you really don’t know how much this meant to me.. I’ve tried to express my appreciations but I don’t think they carried the real power of my feelings… Thank You

7.  Tender Mercy #7: All the kind words so many have offered: It might sound a little unusual to those who haven’t been here, but your words of encouragement mean so much.  I never thought I would start and write a blog.. I am just not that kind of person… whatever kind of person that is… interesting thought…but it has been through this blog that we have had a flowing fountain of freshness; a renewing of spirit in a difficult time.  Thank you for your heartfelt comments:  If I might copy a comment from a friend who wrote.. some might have missed it on the post;  it is an example of the strength you offered us.

“Mike, please know that you have so many of us thinking of and praying for you and your family. Through your words we are given updates. We are also given a vivid picture of a very special young man. I am amazed by his strength of character and faith. His example is truly a blessing for all. You described Adam’s journey over Mt. Everest. When Sir Edmund Hillary struggled with Mt. Everest, someone else struggled with him – Tenzing Norgay. You and Cindy are Adam’s Tenzing Norgay. A full day in the Neurosurgery Waiting Room is a very difficult burden. A burden different from Adam’s; but, a burden, like Adam’s, made lighter by faith and prayer. In spite of your journey over Mt. Everest, you were still able to think of others and pass along your updates. Thank you. Please give Adam our blessings and squeeze his hand for us.”  Randy Hansen

God Bless you all..Thank You.

8. Tender Mercy #8: The Nurses:  Adam has been blessed with wonderful nurses.. I hate to break them out from the pack as there are so many wonderful ladies here:  But I would like offer a special note to Lindsey and Tracy.  You have made Adam so much happier, your care, concern and love shows in your actions.  We so much appreciate you taking a little extra time to spend some one-on-one with Adam…I hope you can keep the bucket list alive, active and well.

9. Tender Mercy #9:  Adam’s Story: The knowledge that Adam’s story has helped others and may be of help to someone in the future.

10. Tender Mercy #10: Interest in Adam: It has been such an uplift to Adam from those who have taken an individual interest in him and who he is; Those who have sat down with him over the years, and in the hospital, and have  had an enjoyable conversation with him, who truly enjoyed Adam for who Adam is.  From a parents perspective there are no greater acts of kindness, no greater examples of Charity than this. I can only imagine that the Savior will be the same with each of us when we meet Him.

11. Tender Mercy #11:  All the Ward Members:  Ward members are those who we go to church with. Their Christ like actions and deeds have been overwhelming.. from the Relief Society Presidency to our Home Teacher, Richard.  All of you have given words of encouragement, hope and offered help… Thank You.

These examples only begin to scratch the surface of the Tender Mercies we have experienced…There are so many, many more; from the office staff at work with all their behind the scenes efforts, to our Bishop and Stake President…. I do not believe this blog could hold the number of blessings we have experienced from the people who have touched our lives and who are pulling for Adam… Thank You.

Lastly I wish to express my Love to Adam’s mother…Cindy…Her love for me and for our family is the greatest Tender Mercy I have experienced in this life. I am so grateful to a kind, loving Heavenly Father who took mercy on me and allowed such a wonderful woman to come into my life. She has such depth; such compassion and such insights:  I would like to post an email she sent to me just a little while ago;  Cindy I love you for all that you are… A Daughter of God:  Thank You.

“A thought occurred to me while driving home.  A thought that gives me comfort and peace..a thought that I believe has come from heaven. I think that right now Adam is like a caterpillar who is in a cocoon.  A lot is happening inside there right now..new pathways are being constructed…connections are being made….he is being shaped and molded until finally one day he will emerge from that cocoon.  The Adam that emerges from this cocoon will be as a beautiful butterfly… even more beautiful than he was before because he will have learned so much. He will have greater empathy, deeper compassion and be more like our Savior Jesus Christ. I am anxious for the day that I see this precious butterfly emerge and unfold his beautiful wings. I love you Adam.”  Cindy.. AKA  MOM

Adam giving Loren a Hug

Adam Giving Shelby a Hug

Crew on the Eagle Scout Project

Dr. Lee and Team